modern_l_o_v_e

I saw it on your keyboard, you saw it on my sleeve

2008-12-05T08:15:58Z

Its been a few months since I came on here. I forgot this exsisted. Things have been really well. I'm so much happier than I have been, in such a long time. I just cant believe I let it get the way it did. Let myself slip away so badly. It kind of blows my mind. I feel like Im back to myself again, with a little more maturity. As if I was sleeping for two years, and some one finally shook me to wake up. So hit me up, lets chill :]

Im working at walmart right now. Sold my souuul. Im hoping to take a CNA class soon. Retail is killing me :]

DECEMBER 20 is coming soon !!! :D

OHAND&!
I got an apartment! Im living on my own [Well, with Krissy :] ] and would love some company to come and curl up on my couch and watch LOST with me :]

Oh, midnight showing this month? Anyone up for it?

!

Only I dont know how, it got out dear.

2008-02-11T04:16:30Z

Basically, im stressed.
I quite dog training because people just stressed me out too much. It really sucks, because I love the actual training of the dogs.
I just hate the retard owners.
I was juggling learning how to drive, teaching a dog to sit, school plus ccri classes and on top of it all, trying to stay in shape. In my spare time i showered. its unfair, but i dont regret it and I learned SO much.
School blows. Ive honestly had it, and im ready to tell just about every teacher that they can suck my balls. Ive had about as much as i can take.
my contacts keep bothering me, and I was so bumed out i inahled everything i saw :]
Im sick of hearing about all this devistation in the world. Im sick of trying to fix everyones problems, and im sick of saying im sorry.
Which brings me to another note.
Im not going to say it anymore, and you can fuck off. All I have ever done was try to help you, and if you've known me for so long, you should know im going to say my piece. seriously. kiss my ass.
i kindof went through this period where i wanted to make up for the things ive done wrong. or set right friendships that ended wrong.
I could care less now.
Im just way to stressed to look at the negitive things in my life, and id much rather just look to my positive, my future. My michael :] Corny, but true.

Ive got college coming up, very likly moving out with kristina, and a totally torn up hand from a pitbull. such is life.

Ill leave my love between the stars

2007-11-28T20:47:52Z

I cant even remember the last time I even checked, let alone updated this thing. Its so pointless.
But, lifes alright.
My classes suck, the new food sucks, mrs. girolimin sucks :]
But whats new?

modern_l_o_v_e @ 2007-10-03T08:51:00

2007-10-03T13:03:16Z

This school is so screwed up. I went to guidance to ask if I needed to take necap, because I was a sophmore last year, and now being a senior, I would have missed it. Accoring to Ms. Ross, Juniors never took necap, and I dont need it. So I double checked with the office, and they told me to check with guidance, who double checked that juniors never took it, and now Im in study, with Mr. C in the writing center. For the next two hours, and Im pretty sure Im going to kill myself.
I might get another job, because my life isnt busy enough. Itd only be six hours a week though. And I need the money. Badly. I have so many bills, and Im always so broke. It sucksss.
Schools been okay though. Im pretty souped that Im missing Mrs. Girolimin today though. Ive got lunch with Renee today :] too bad its with Mrs. Delcesto.

Mike and I had our one year on september 24th, and it was like, perfect :]
We went out to dinner, and he looked so cute. The food made a me a little sick though :/ then we went to Roger Williams gazebo, and exchanged gifts, and it was basically perfect. He got me a beautiful ringgg :] Then we changed, and went out for desert.
AND. Im pretty souped for Friday! :]]]
Ive got work for the next four days. Wed, Thurs, Fri 4-10, and sat 10-4.

AND! Happy Birthday Jill!

modern_l_o_v_e @ 2007-09-15T05:50:00

2007-09-16T03:20:55Z

Schools alright.
My classes are okay. They have a good flow.
I just cant wait to get out of CHS.
Im sick of the construction, the illegal immigrant workers, and the new principal that considers herself the daughter of satan.
Everything else is good.
One year with Mike on the 24 :]<3
Crazy right?!

Hows everything for everyone else that I never talk to anymore?

modern_l_o_v_e @ 2007-08-12T04:15:00

2007-08-12T08:21:18Z

Summers great, life is wonderful, love is beautiful.
Cumberland fest offically blew rides wise.
But I loved seeing everyone and catching up :]
So, I suppose the 5 dollar entery fee and the expensive tickets were worth it.
Summers been so great, the sunshine, freedom, and best of all-no girolomin :]
And, ofcourse, its all being spent with Mike and Kimberlie.
I honestly cant believe Ill be a senior. And then soon enough, Ill be in college. "growing up" hits fast huh?
I went to mystic a few weeks ago with mike and his family, and fell in love with the penguins :]
This week were going to six flags and plymouth, and im so souped :]
Im almost done with ccri classes!

How is everyone?!

Where do the good go?

2007-03-20T23:36:06Z

Will God forgive us for what we've done to each other?

Forget you two.

modern_l_o_v_e @ 2007-03-07T10:57:00

2007-03-07T16:06:11Z

My computer broke. I want to slit my wrists.
Which really, I shouldnt be joking about.
I think Im failing Spanish by the way.
Girolimin can go royaly fuck herself.
Whatever. You can keep proving to me all the more what an awful friend you are. Its not saying anything new about you. Just a word of advice, maybe you should learn to keep your mouth closed.

But whats new with my life?
Eh, nothing to special. I started health classes with Bryan. I just got over being sick. Adams getting his permit. Mike♥ just paid off his car. Kimerlie hasnt called me in like a weeeeeek. Amanda and I had some intense socks ;] Ive been cleaning like crazy. Im getting pretty lazy as far as schools concerned. Ive been ditching classes with Vicky a lot, and we had the most bomb breakfast ever last friday. I cant wait for next Monday. Anna Nichole Smith is finally burried, now we can all resume back to our normal lives. I started a diet, and believe it or not, Ive actually been sticking to it. Which reminds me Im starviiiiing. And lunch is next, with Adaaam! I really want chocolate milk, and I have no idea whats going on in Chem.
Whats new with youuuuu?!?!

I'll never let you go, I'll never let you go...

2007-02-07T02:54:05Z

I donated blood today, in honor of my father.
But what was really, really great is that I told Mrs. Clark why I was doing it, and she donated too, in his name.
Its things like that, that prove there is still some love and compassion left in the world.
She really doesnt know what that means to me.

modern_l_o_v_e @ 2007-01-31T22:57:00

2007-02-01T03:58:15Z

TODAY
Is such a great day for love :]<3

modern_l_o_v_e @ 2007-01-28T16:08:00

2007-01-28T21:15:01Z

:]]]]
AMAZING.

>:O

2007-01-26T18:31:05Z

Its ridiculas that this man died.
Im so many things culturaly, but I really take pride in being Armenian. Maybe because of the fact that Im mostly Armenian, and partly because of everything that my ancestors have gone through.
And I really, really dispise people who can have enough hate in their heart to kill a man in cold blood, a journalist, for trying to make our past known, when a Turkish goverment completly denies the Genicide.
And for Dink to have been murdered, because of some nationalist who doesnt even know the whole truth? Thats ridiculas.

Moving Forward using all my breath

2007-01-26T02:26:13Z

I'm making things right.
And you really dont know how glad I am.
Im sorry, to everyone, [and that certian some one more than others] that Ive been so bitter and crabby lately.
And Im sorry for picking fights over small things, over reacting and just plain being a bitch.
And Im sorry for everyone that had to get through it.
I just really hope things will be normal again.♥

But anyways.
I learned today, that not everyone is as tough as they seem.
That theres a reason behind every bad word, even if your the cause.
I knew this already. But today it truely sunk in.

Its a scary thing, growing up.
Im looking for a job. Im tired of being unproductive.
And as much as it sounds strange to me, I actually WANT to.
Im going to be 18 this year.
Thats terrifying.
I also learned my brothers all have girlfriends. Everyones growing up.
:]

A name makes no matter to me, as long as I can call you my own

2007-01-09T14:53:39Z

:]
My weekend was amazing.
My life is amazing.
And, Ive got some really killer cramps.
That being said, I talked to Mrs. White and she gave me until Friday to make up my Flame Lab & Ethenol report. [Which, Im STILL dreading to do]
Tommorrow Im going to Wicked with Mike :]♥ Who, by the way is amazing.
And Ive got some really killer cramps.
I kind of just want to go home and want to sleep for a few hours.
But at the same time I want to talk and be exciting.
Ahh.
Love!

"When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with a person, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible."

Goodbye, 2006

2007-01-02T04:33:29Z

Until a few months ago, I could without a doubt say that 2006 has been the worst year Ive had yet.
I lost so many important things, friends, and worst, my father.
I realzied, looking back, that I was very selfish, foolish, and arrogent.
I wasnt happy with who I was, nor was I comfortable.
But, as bad often does, it over shadows the good.
In this year, I also figured out exactly who I am, and what kind of a person I want to grow to be. I met some amazing people that have changed my life, made ties stronger with those I lost, and got rid of the negitive influances.
But, more importantly, I found Mike, who I love more than anything or anyone in the world. In just the time Ive known him, he can take an entire year of hardships, and some how make everything seem unimportant. He makes me want to be a better person, and I truely feel lucky to even know such a sweet, amazing person. But to know that he loves me, and that he feels the same...Its completely amazing. Hes completely amazing. Finding him, was truly a blessing.
Secondly, for the first time in my life, Ive expirienced what it was like, to have a father. Im not going to get into my realtionship with my dad, but I do love him. Willie has been there for me, when no one else has. I love him with all my heart. And for the first time in 17 years, I finally know what its like to have a dad. And thats something to be thankful for.

I think Ive been pretty lucky.
So, with that said, for 07, I want to do more for people who arnt so fortunate.
I want to strengthen the bonds I have with everyone.
& I want to drop 15 pounds haah

2007 is going to be the best yet.

modern_l_o_v_e @ 2006-12-28T01:02:00

2006-12-28T06:07:20Z

Yep.

Im getting preeeeetty sick of this.

But other than that Ive been insanly happy. Dispite the fact.

Ahhh. Loooooooove♥

I saw Bruce twice this week! Im gonna miss him.
I still have to see Ryan.

Ahh.

Bologna

Baby, Its Fact

2006-12-21T05:36:58Z

So my 17th birthday was definatly one of the best Ive had in years.
Mike picked me up from school, and Kim was in the car. They had a cake & balloons :]
Then we chilled at my house for a while with Adam [and Kim fell between the cracks]. Then Mike dropped them off & picked me up. We went out to eat, then he took me ice skating! We met up with Mike & Ilaura. & I fell. Atleast 12 times. Did I mention that I was terrifyed to ice skate? haha I did better than last time though ;] Then we got hot chocolate, & I watched Mind Freak with my mom haha [Did I mention Criss Angels the new love of my life??]
But, thanks to everyone who made it amazing. Seriously, I love you sososo much.

And thanks to that special someone who completely forgot.

I bet that you look good on the dance floor

2006-12-18T23:25:45Z

I got one hour of sleep last night.
Becuase I realzied how lucky I am.
And I just stayed in bed, thinking about how thankful I am.
And how I take everything for granted.

I feel like I'm changing.
But in a good Im-Not-Letting-You-Walk-All-Over-Me way.

I really, really miss Mike.

BUT- my birthday! IS WEDNESDAY
:D

!

2006-12-16T16:05:24Z

This has been the worst two days I've had in a loooong time.
Whatever.
I've been comming to a lot of conclusions lately.
For example, Im sick of feeling second best.
And pushed to the side.
But basically, this is what Im sick of.

Trying to get back what we had, and you completely blowing me off.
That was pretty chill of you. Espically since all you could talk about was how much you missed me on the phone. Its also wicked awesome how you LIED to me, because you were offered something better. Its not like were "best friends" and havent seen each other in a month or anything is it?
Its seriously bullshit.

Im sick of feeling second best. Im sick of people getting comfortable with me, and knowing that they can push me to the side because they know I'll forgive them. Im sick of feeling unappricated. Im sick of being blown off. Im sick of being lied to.
And even though I know that there are more important people than me in your life, Im sick of feeling like your rubbing it in my face.

Whatever.

Im done.

I'll run away with you

2006-11-01T19:55:10Z

So todays that filthy spanish holiday DAY OF THE DEAD!

Yesterday was halloween.
My mother and I fought. So now I have serious ass kissing to do .-.
I went down to Pawtucket, met up with Mike, Josh, Kim & Patrick.
Even thoough last years was more eventful, I wouldnt have wanted to spend it with anyone else in the world.

Hows everyone else doing?
Tell me all about life, and what exactly makes it amazing. :]

Our lips can touch

2006-10-12T23:20:40Z

Things are good.
I havent seen Kim in a week, and its throwing me off.
Im passing everything but Gym & Chem class, which is a surprize.
Minutes seem to be dragging out today. I really dont know why.
I found out some bad news yesterday.
Im kind of beside myself.
Oh well.
What new?
Nothing too surprizing.
Tell me nice things, and put a smile on my face. :]

And I Feel my soul heavy with love untold

2006-09-22T14:04:53Z

I hate not knowing what to do.
Dispite the fact that I can reason it out in my head, to give me reassurance, and perhaps even guidance, over all the situation leaves me feeling drained.
Blah.
"Im going to put a sign on my door saying 'Free thinkers wanted. Gangstas need not apply.' IM at war with the gangstas. And when it comes to this kind of war, I'll win." --- Mr. Twining.

♥

"Shes Like JESUS" - Kyle Parent :]

2006-09-13T17:19:51Z

Some times its easiest just not to think about it.
To focus on the smaller things in life, like how beautiful fall is.
And actually allow myself to be in ignorance, rather than own up the some of these issues Im facing.
Its just easier that way.
I cant say its the smartest thing to do, but it feels some what close to right at the moment.

Lifes changing, and in so many ways, Im more than happy to go along with it. But other times I look at it, from a strangers view, and cant imagine why I make the choices I do. And even still, I regret nothing. I suppose that makes me careless. But through everything, my belief in fate has become even stronger.

I suppose what Im looking for, is answers.

Have heart my dear, were bound to be afraid...

2006-09-04T19:36:48Z

Ive really loved the past week. Ive just had so much fun.
It was great to see everyone at school. And just do nothing, besides get coffee, talk, and listen to Crawelys Ipod.
And ofcourse, as always, I had a blast just chilling with Mike and Josh. And Friday! I got to see Monica, and meet a bunch of people. && I saw Charlotttte!
Saterday and Sunday I spent with Mike, Josh and Adam, which is always fun.

Ive had a lot to think about over the last few days.
A lot of things are becomming blurred, and Ive found clarity for others.
Im just stuck in the middle, unsure of what to make of things, pin pointing problems.

>.

<3

2006-08-31T01:32:37Z

I woke up today, at 6 in the morning.
Which is the earliest Ive woken up all summer.
Only to hurry up, get dressed, try and look semi decent.
Only to hear that the school was on strike, and I was pointlessly up.
So Bryan Brunelle came and saved me from total bordem. It was wicked fun. Ive missed him so much. We talked and told stories, and yes, Ill admit it, he kicked my ass.

But, as a recap, Sunday with that sexy pussycat known as Jillybean was awesome. We caught up. Ive missed her too.<3
Monday Josh and Mike came and picked me up. We went to CCRI and got lost a few times. Then we came to mi casa and watched Silent Hill.
Tuesday Eddy came over, to say goodbye. I wicked hate how EVERYONES moving on me. :[

BUT.
I suppose tomm is the REAL first day haha.
♥